a little bit better

Today seems to be starting out better...at least for me right now... I am having a hard time with this time change..just cant seem to get it right..

Anyway, I went to bed with Levon going under listening to James Fortune, I trust you testimony. I'm telling you, this is my new anthem. I feel him in the song. People always look to you for motivation, inspiration, and guidance. However, little do they know, that you need somebody to pray for you. You need to know that God has not left you. I'm not saying I don't whats best for my family and friends cause Lord knows I wouldn't pray for them, with them if I didn't. I keep asking God whats the purpose for this storm- show me. And like the song he keeps telling me to wait cause even if I told you, you wouldn't believe me- I think that is the part that burns my soul- cause he right, if I saw the blessing out of it, I would be like naw that's not for me...

I woke up singing Wait on the Lord by Fred Hammond & John P Kee. I love this song as well. Soon as I came to this morning, the lyrics were in beaded in my head...

As I past on the daily word this morning...I came across this.....

We fail to wait on God’s timing. For example,
perhaps the Lord has given you an assurance
that He picked out a spouse for you. But years
pass and nothing seems to happen. Don’t get
impatient; the Father is preparing that person
for you—getting him or her ready for marriage.
Don’t rush into something or try to pressure
the Lord. People miss out on wonderful gifts
because they fail to wait on God’s timing.
This is something I wrestle with... I had a talk with my sister this weekend and she said marry Brad or Lee, the guys in the military. She said they have wonderful benefits and you and your kids will be set for life. Now, this I know and believe however Brad already has been thru a nasty ugly divorce, has 2 boys and not sure if he wants more. He lives in Baton Rouge and frugal as hell. Now all this is ok but I'm not attracted to him. Yeah we went to high school together and maybe once or twice we attempted to start something but it never panned it out. However, now that I am older and been there and done that I truly know what I do and don't want. I feel like I'm not meant to be a military wife. I have prayed about and I know both are friends of mine but I cant see them and me together long term. Lee I wanted him before he went into the military but now I just cant see us together, still cant. Only God Knows( 112 song) my heart! But the pressure is so on to just settle. However the wise women of my family keeping saying wait and you will know when its right.

I do believe God has picked out my husband and is molding us for each other. I keep telling my BFF, that I feel it. He took me thru the Marcus deal to prepare me for him. I dont know how long the preparation is going to take but I know I will be EVERY WOMAN!